Leanne - Well, somebody got up on the wrong side of bedlam this morning. I actually thought about opening a halfway house for tight-assed whores, but they really let me down with their laxity of cheek.
"shuttling through soberspace" mucks with the rhythm a bit -- I can stretch shuttling out into three syllables as I guess you're doing, but I think you'd be better to stick another syllable in there instead, like "the soberspace" (soberspace is awesome, by the way).
I'm not convinced that "distract" is the best word right at the end, it's a bit... something... I know what I mean. It just leaves me thinking "what's the distraction?" right after I go "ooh, something shiny".
Still, much to love here and delighted to see you back and abusive as ever.
Aphasic - Well, somebody got up on the wrong side of bedlam this morning. I actually thought about opening a halfway house for tight-assed whores, but they really let me down with their laxity of cheek.
Too many openings breed contempt perhaps.
"shuttling through soberspace" mucks with the rhythm a bit -- I can stretch shuttling out into three syllables as I guess you're doing, but I think you'd be better to stick another syllable in there instead, like "the soberspace" (soberspace is awesome, by the way).
I'd be interested to know how people read that (shut-ul-ing/shut-ling), though I doubt 'other readings' are destined to happen, so I guess it's just you and me to thrash out the rhythm...leaving me with another syllable stick to suck on and spit out when the edit frenzy strikes :>
I'm not convinced that "distract" is the best word right at the end, it's a bit... something... I know what I mean. It just leaves me thinking "what's the distraction?" right after I go "ooh, something shiny".
That's the nature of anti-climax - attract/distract, collide/coincide - I really wanted to go out on a low here, prevarication permitting *pallid disposable smile*
Still, much to love here and delighted to see you back and abusive as ever.
Oh, surely I'm a girlie more sinned against than sinning? Or is that just my intrapersonal dialogue bubble bursting?
I'm touched by your delight - an undeserved reward for breaking the cycle of self-abuse :>
Leanne - I find that self abuse is much more enjoyable when you do it to someone else...
May I sin against you? It sounds like fun.
Aphasic - Oh, that's so shallow Leanne! You're just looking for some fun? I thought you'd never ask :x)
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