Dirty queen - Shakespeare's Monkeys

Dirty queen

By Daniela Voicu

How lovely the morning is, penetrated

by the silence of the loneliness

and the sleepy green

red dragons fly in circles

around the lost feelings

Next to me on the old couch

God watches a movie with clowns.

I play chess, and it is naked

all around the queen

that dirty

dirty

queen.

She reads the lines in my palm

and speaks lies

about my dearest stars.

Beside me,

my cup of Romanian coffee is still hot

while i wait

for the green to wake

Comments

Derma Kaput -

well, this is an odd little gem. where did you come from Daniela?

Daniela Voicu -

I am from Romania, Member of Romanian League of Writers.Thank you to reading me.

Derma Kaput -

It was my pleasure, and I'll do so again. Welcome to the site.

Stephan Anstey -

Nice Job Daniela.I am really glad to have you here! You're our first Romanian poet ever.

Leanne Hanson -

Oh, I do like this -- you have some brilliant ideas. I love "God watches a movie with clowns" and the shifts in tone between the stanzas.

I think "the silence of the loneliness" is not quite right though. It's almost too obvious. Also, do you think you need a comma or line break between green and red in the first stanza, or are the dragons green-red? (I don't even know what that colour could be, but it could be an interesting paradox).

Daniela, please do post more, your voice is refreshing and fascinating.

Laura doom -

Hi Daniela -- written as telegraphic thought, bypassing the niceties of socio-perceptual management; crisp and natural, according to human nature.
Perhaps 'unvoiced lonliness' might be an acceptable compromise in the context?