Keep Yourself Inside

Waiting for the Fall

1. "An Invitation to Trespass"

All around me I see people mistaking chaos for order and/or order for chaos. I should explain. Yes. Allow me to explain myself. I think you'll find I'm fairly reasonable. For those of you who can't recognize reason, well, it's never too late. (time passes) Life: One crossroad after another. Not a maze. The road less travelled is paved and littered with toll booths. The Third World is home to the last ink and paper worth saving. I'm an American. So feel sorry for me. Listen to my story. No! No! Just listen... (blah 10 blah 20 blah 30) You're listening, promise? My parents divorced. I was only 8. Mother hardly visited the grocer. She drank. Umm... She verbally abused me, yes! My childhood was a veritable prison sentence, one with cats and cable television. NO MOVIE CHANNELS, MIND YOU! Basic cable. What could be worse? Crucifixion? Maybe. Lord, I need a decent haircut. Amen. (in progress)

2. "35 Line Poetry Contest"

(1) I am not a poet (2) That's clear enough (3) And I don't say that to sound cute or clever (4) No. Far from it (6) I mean each and every word (7) Each word: meaningful and simple in its form (8) What sort of poet carries themselves that way? (9) No one I know of (10) So, then, I'm no poet (11) You'll agree, no? (12) This simple fact mustn't go without saying (13) Because the overabundance of words can easily be pawned off as poetry (14) Just like it's easy to mistake a lazy writer for a Neo-Bohemian poet (15) Only there's no such thing as Neo-Bohemian poetry (16) But why should that get in the way? (17) If you can't write, then write poetry (18) There's not a person in the world who could tell the difference (19) Poets aren't to be trusted (20) Poets are preachers (21) Poetry, their gospel according to who fuck cares (22) Coffee shops, their churches, their temples, their mosques (23) But I'll refrain from disguising obviousness in metaphors (24) That's not to say they're all together awful (25) Poetry readings make for wonderful comedy (26) Well they used to (27) Now I drink too much (28) And I can't stop myself from laughing (29) It's not right, to cause a scene (30) Scenes are uncivilized (31) And isn't that the whole point? (32) Civilized for the sake of exclusion (33) Poets exclude (34) Nothing more (35) "Okay! I've got 35 lines!" (36) Shhh...we're not allowed here (37) The rules stated 35 lines or less (38) But I'm not a poet (39) And this is not a poem (40) So (41) Fuck (42) If (43) I (44) Don't (45) Use (46) As (47) Many (48) Lines (49) As (50) I (51) Please (52) After all, writers don't count lines

Comments

Sinnaminsun -
I was drawn here by your interesting comments in my post "Poetry that makes you sick". I bet you're an editor....and I don't mean that in a bad way:)

Icarus Iscariot -

i didn't have enough time do much more than set up the page and jot down the first few lines of what i'm hoping might progress into "something more". i'm locked up everyday from 9-5. i'd be interested in getting your feedback once i fill out the skeleton. you know, if you don't mind and all that...

i am curious, though, how or why you made a connection between my posts and harboring the suspicion of my being an editor. i'm not offended, only curious.

Leanne -

I'd rip and criticise and tell you not to be such a smart arse but to be honest, I don't think there are any "lines" there that I haven't thought myself once or twice (particularly 36).

No poet is really a poet. There are capital P Poets who put it on their business cards (handing it to you with the left hand because the right one's still sticky), or there are people who write poems and wonder what the hell they're bothering for. The poet as a breed is far too much of a hybrid to be recognised as such. Poets are mongrels. Mongrels who can't count.

Icarus Iscariot -

you're lovely. such an individual. i'm smitten with you. and please don't go overboard and start taking it the wrong way. it's healthy to have crushes on imaginary woman who live 6,000 miles away. plus you're plain evil. so what difference does it make?

Leanne -

I take exception to that, I am not "plain" anything.

You have sadly fallen victim to one of the hoaxes of the English language. Common belief is that the past participle "smitten" is a real word, when in fact to smite leaves one completely smut.

Icarus Iscariot -

i'm sorry, L. i was only fooling around. go easy on me, eh?--i'm just a young american, not some hard-drinking bloke.

as far as falling victim to "smitten". if more people get it wrong than those who get it right, wouldn't be more practical to change the rule instead of correcting everyone? i can't even remember the last time i said or wrote smitten. i've certianly never had it said to me. boo hoo...poor me...

Sinnaminsun -

Yes, I'd like you see your final version once it's complete. On to your question as to why I thought you were an editor, it's just a hunch...editors often go incognito by typing in all lower case letters;)