early morning

outside
acorns pool up
against the curb

where squirrels rustle food
from wind-piled leaves,
dry-cracked and brittle.

this strange October,
heavy with heat
and thick air,
seems summer lost,
wandering
away from home.

inside
on the table,
hot cereal sits steaming,
'warm, indulgent aroma’
as advertised.

I set the spoon
back in the bowl,
weary of force-feeding
my empty appetite.

Rene -

Don't know where you are located but you have just described my weather here today! I love the turn of the last stanza, well done.

---- Rene'

I am orbiting, I don't know where, but I am orbiting something!

Hey, bud, aren't we a bit late in posting this? It's definitely past autumn.

I liked this a lot. Nice structure, good line breaks, lotsa images. One change I suggest is L7: "Dry-cracked, brittle" or "dry-cracked / brittle".

Sorry that autumn steals away your appetite. I like the change seasons - they make me hungry. Guess I'm more like the squirrel!

Alcuin

Norm -
Autumn is my favorite season, but this year it was as warm as summer. I'm not good with warm weather, especially in the fall.

Pags -
I like this revision. It feels tighter, and more complete as a result.

Menu

User login

Member Pages »

See also

Monkeys: There are no monkeys here. If you're looking for monkeys, go away. Well, actually there are monkeys, but they're of the hairless variety that writes poetry and such. If that's not what you're looking for move along.