6 degrees of separation

the small world effect

in a big city landscape

difficult for a gypsy to gauge

the perennial new kid

for once

stays

weeks…months…years

unaccustomed

to being recognized

traceable

transient’s anonymity

hostage

to a sticky web of

accountability

a dangerous matrix

could

make an honest woman

1- Alcuin of York on Aug. 4 2007

So?

What are we to take from this? More to the point, what did you want us to take from this? In other words, what is it you're trying to say? "Small world effect in a big city landscape" seems to be backwards. This appears to be about the big city's effect on the gypsy. "Difficult for a gypsy to gauge"? A rather weak line I think, whereas the next line is quite good.

I think one of the problems with this is you haven't taken a metaphor or theme and developed it. It could have been the gypsy or the perennial (a plant, growing, needing sunlight etc.?) or the anonymity (usually considered more likely in the big city) or anything else. I think you have here the early traces of a poem, but nothing developed.

Alcuin

2- Rhiannon Jones on Aug. 4 2007

Guess I'm being too obscure! The first stanza refers to the experience of encountering a surprising abundance of interconnections (the old 6 degrees of separation idea) even in the context of a very large community. For one who rarely stays in one place for long (the gypsy) it is difficult to know whether this is the norm, or a freakish set of coincidences.

I didn't want to stick with a single metaphor, but perhaps if I use "big city grid" in the first stanza, the similar images of grid, web, and matix would tie together? Thanks for reading carefully and for commenting!

3- Anstey on Aug. 4 2007

I'm curious about 'small world' vs. the city. To me, 'small town' might be a bit more appropriate? I definitely might be missing something though. I just equate small world as more opposed to globe-trotting.
-----

stephan

4- Rhiannon Jones on Aug. 5 2007

"Small world effect" was intended to refer to that 6 degrees thing....with just 6 connections, you can trace anyone to Kevin Bacon. So, small town would be quite a different meaning. i think my reference is way too obscure, and as I am really not at all commited to this particular poem...I wrote it a while ago... I think I'm just gonna abandon it. For now, anyway.

5- Alcuin of York on Aug. 5 2007

Oops! Actually, I was unfamiliar with the term "6 degrees of separation" and also with the Kevin Bacon game. I thought it was just your title, rather than a well-known (except to moi) concept. So rereading, it now makes perfect sense - except possibly for the "dangerous". I assume you mean ‘scary for one accustomed to transiency'. If not, it's unclear; if so, then kudos to you.

Sorry for the ignorance, and thankful for learning something for this day.

Oh yes - it's a pretty good poem too.

Alcuin