Mosaic Mama Memories

Mother's Day Tribute

I choose to remember..

pushing you
on the mosaic sidewalks of New Orleans
haphazard flagstones
occasionally brave enough
to weave us
out into the streets
only months before
filled with Katrina
sweat and tears
so busy loving our time-out
away from everyone
we took no pictures at all
Now a wistful regret
As I shuttled you to
Every place I love
but knowing how your eye lenses
shuttered every smile
Of the winsome moment

Our shared summers...

Chip calling me on your cell
he was there,
calling from our moonwalk
but didn't tell
until he'd tested the waters
of our welcome
as I'd taken a break from
pushing you outside our hotel
and you loved
and I loved
that you loved
our love and would share
my joy for his joining us there
In the city I adore
This man I love with a love
I didn’t think existed

Our shared summers….

Sitting at your feet
massaging the wildflower days
of waitressing away *
laughing over Wendy and William's
Oh so English! ways
Trying their "stout"
and escargot
mutually deciding
we could live without
but not without

Our shared summers...

On Ship Island
Or Biloxi for Ronnie's class reunion
we drew our names in the sand
tipsy of course… after
feeling guilty for leaving you
At the hotel alone
But returning to find you gone
To the bar
telling joke after joke
From table to table
“Hey, West Virginia, I’ve got one for you!”
“Hey , Texas, come over here!”
“Hey Missouri, have you heard…?”

Our shared summers…

The first one in Tennessee
Driving down in your white Camaro
Our first new employee
As a management team
In a fast food joint
A husband hired his mother-in-law
We thought that the funniest joke
When we had that funny joint
And mother/daughter shared a toke

Our shared summers…

So many little colored glasses
That picture many a memory
And I cherish every one.
Mama, I love you.

p.s. Thank you for critiquing, Anstey! Very much appreciated.Until I figure out how to reply to your comment, this p.s. will have to do.

Comments

Anstey -

I very much like many parts of this - but just for the sake of giving you some constructive criticism (since that's the point here!)

The picture in the middle, purely for layout reasons is distracting and makes it hard to read.

The ending detracts poetically, but as a tribute is marvelous. Now this is just my personal opinion, but after an entire poem of 'showing' isntead of 'telling' the sudden shift to the imperial tone seemed unsuited there at the end.

There is absolutely no 'technical' reason for this particular thought, but I wonder if it might read better if the first stanza more closely matched the others. A bit of paring down there or possibly breaking it into two bits, might work a little more smoothly i think.

the line breaks are surprisingly effective.

nice job.

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stephan

Laurie -

What a lovely tribute to your Mom! Does each section designate a different Summer? Or just different thoughts during the same summer?

I'm still really unsure if this is the way to respond to comments, so I hope y'all will be patient with my ignorance. The first two are of one occasion last summer.I just split it up per Stephan's suggestion.The others are separate occasions. I really need to work on it. I just felt like I needed to write a tribute to my Mom that was positive. This is such a little tiny portion of memories I cherish, but I had to start somewhere. I had in mind to mail to her last known address like my spiritual advisor suggested in the hopes that her mail is still being forwarded, but now, I don't know. I love and miss her and I just wanted to write something expressing it. Mother's Day has been heavy heavy on my mind.

Anstey -

I generally respond to comments by adding a comment myself, rather than editting other people's -- but I suppose you can do either. There's really not a 'right way'

Fondly

stephan

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stephan