Searching for Something: On how I write poetry.

Searching for Something

I have this amazing friend, who I was talking to about poetry and such, and she was seemingly taken aback when I said, "I don't buy into the 'writing from the heart' or 'write what you feel' or any of that crap. I just decide what to write and write it. I have A LOT of poetry that I've written... most of it is absolutely awful. I can't be worried about that though. One must accept what happens and move on."

I thought at first, it was because she took that as a personal insult to her own work, but I think, maybe that wasn't it. It is as much an insult to anyone that reads what I write, and doesn't think it's crap, and feels inspired  or moved by it. It suggests that I"m being insincere and manipulative in everything I write and do.

And, as I've said to anyone who asks, It isn't as if anything I'm writing is some great masterpiece -- the English language will be fine without my tiny bit of turd on the grand pile of verbiage.

When I write, the meaning and sincerity are there, even if, during the act of writing, I do my level best to not let my emotions control my pen. I realize that I am at odds with almost every poet I meet on these issues.

I write best when I separate myself from my feelings on things. I construct poems, and try to use craft and skill. One of the first things I do is try to remove the line i like most and rewrite the poems without it. Almost every poet I know, thinks I'm an idiot. BUT, it works for me. I don't tell anyone how to write poetry really. For just that reason.

To my way of thinking, poetry is just like any other writing. It's no different to write a poem than it is directions on how to tie shoelaces. The only difference is the effect. A poem typically works toward the emotional; the tools we use to write a poem are more effective in evoking feelings and emotions than say the language and tools one uses to describe putting together a bookcase.

When I start a poem, I decide its purpose and atmosphere first. That allows me to select the language, the rhythm, and the images more specifically relevant to the piece. It's really no different than how I might write an essay and the fact that feelings are set aside does not remove the meaning of the message.

I do not write for some sort of emotional catharsis. My writing gives me all the joy that any act of free will might, but the connection to an audience -- the moment when someone understands some something that is in my head, and understands me -- THAT is a reason to write.

What I 'feel' is irrelevant to writing process except perhaps as subject matter, but what I think and learn and known, and how I'm able to share my feelings and communicate my thoughts through writing -- using poetic tools, or prose tools, or tech-writing tools -- that's an amazing thing full of meaning.

Fully grasping what I want to say, finding some inner calm, and letting go of random stray emotion and feelings before I write, that does not mean that what I write was not ABOUT my feelings, it means I tried to set them aside while i wrote it. Writing for me is about communicating, it's not about making myself feel good. I'm not often trying to release some inner demons or work out my thoughts when I write. That is more what I do when I sit quietly by myself.

Regardless, the point is this: I'm not insulting you when I say I don't buy into the write-what-you-feel or 'write-from-the-heart' things. I am sure for many of you, that's exactly what you do, and it works for you.

To those I will inevitably insult whenever I talk about these things -- I suppose you can take this as a blanket pre-apology, and then I'll give you a personalized one after the fact.