While You Were Showering I Had an Epiphany

I try so hard
Not to

Miss you that is

I fail dismally each day that passes

Remembering how much my arms calmed you
How my words could warm
Or harm you

I dwell on your meaning
Your impact
On this simulacrum
Called Andrew

How you calm me
Restraining the violence
Inherent in my brand of lunacy

How I long to see
That dreamy look in your eyes
That exhausted
Just hold me
Look

What is your hair like now
What creation have you willed into being
Does it cover your neck
Has it changed colour
Does it still smell wonderful

Does that vein in your neck
Still pulse visibly
When you are aroused

Do I still love you
Or do I just miss you

I’m not sure

All I know is
Nothing tremors beside me now
Nothing beats in my chest

I think of nothing

Nothing but you

© 2009, Mosquitobyte