far from bulletproof

while each poet interprets the meaning of words and word usage through different filters, I especially appreciate creativity in language utilization.....

exactly because I tend to write in a somewhat conventional manner, unlike the 'language poets' who are much more advant garde.....which leads me to this observation: I love the line break right in the middle of the word "limitless".......

imho, this creates two intersecting thoughts.....first, "the night is limit".....implying boundaries defined by nightfall.....second, "-less, boundless, a burden"......speaks to lack of boundaries, and the unconventional interpretation of that being a burden, rather than freedom......

both thoughts then transition into the last lines of the stanza, touching upon more transcendent themes of the eternal [the sky] and spiritual disappointment, perhaps [never fulfulling the promise of peace]......

that said, I believe "as though were they not/ treading I'd drown" would be a much better place to end this poem, as the lines that follow tend to meander a bit too close to overused imagery......to my ear, you've written an excellent poem up until the "treading" line.....Kat