far from bulletproof

"the night is
limitless
boundless,
a burden that never fulfills
its promise of peace"

Was there a specific reason for the breaks you used? Did you have a particular effect in mind?

Also, instead of "sees the sky", you might consider "looks to the sky".

Generally, I liked this. Like most of your writes, there are a lot of interesting juxtapositions here.

Alcuin