First try - Little Willies

Please don’t toss me out da window upon a prickly cactus.  I’m very sensitive and I bruise easily.

Here are a few suggestions for you to consider:

First stanza line 1: Duncan Doodle’s might work better than Doodles Duncan.

“Duncan Doodle’s big and fat”

First stanza line 3:  You need another beat here, how about “Kitty” instead of cat.

“Now that kitty haunts his dreams”

First stanza line 4:  It had way too many beats.  It didn’t flow or make sense with the rest of the poem. I think a line about the cat haunting his dreams works better.

“Endless howling cat fights screams”

Second stanza line 1:   I think you need another beat to make each line the same count.

"If you laugh at my poem right here"

Hopefully this will show you what I meant:

Doodles Duncan, big and fat,  ( Duncan Doodle’s big and fat)
Squashed his Grandma's kitty cat.
Now the cat haunts his dreams   (Now that kitty haunts his dreams)
Doodles eats until he splits his seams. (Endless howling cat fights screams)

If you laugh at my poem here (If you laugh at my poem right here)
I'll grab and twist your ugly ear
Toss ya out da window back'ards
Right upon a prickly cactus!