Ginevra Requests the Honor of your Presence and Critique

Leanne - Thanks so much for taking all that time to work on the meter.  I have to say I've read through your post 4 times now, and while I wholly appreciate your efforts to explain this to me in very simple terms, I'm still stuck.  For example, I'm still trying to understand why it works to cut out syllables .  .  . do I just forget the concept of syllables altogether here, and focus on the stresses of the words?   I'm going to need to print off my version, your version, and Alcuin's and really just try to absorb it all before I try to fix it.  I'm afraid I bit off more than I could chew.

As for panicing . . . well, I prefer being 'assertive'    Normally, I wouldn't push it, but this was a riskier piece and I really wanted the feedback, which, as you can see, it desperately required. 

Thanks again for taking the time to work with me on this!