Choosing the Middle

This is a great idea, and nicely drawn, but the biggest problem I can see is a need for economy.  I think you'll find you achieve more with less superfluous words (more punch less tickle).  Shannon's already covered a lot of the places that can be tightened up and they're all good suggestions.

You do need to be careful of cliches.  Using fluttering and butterfly together, for example, is a bit overdone.   So, unfortunately, is the idea of eyes as a lake/sea/pool.  "Holding a knowing secret" is awkward -- it makes it sound like it's the secret that knows something, not the holder.  These images repeated in the last stanza just don't work for me, because they're not exciting enough.  

I really do like the concept of the carnival and the game of chance (it works as a metaphor and an anecdote).   Some day I must find out the significance of this blue motif that keeps showing up in Anstey poetry.