Granite and Silk

Thank you very much! I appreciate any and all constructive criticism and yours was definitely so.

I've actually reworked this poem many times. I've tried cutting things, adding things, making it more coherent, but in the end my main consistency is I'm just having trouble perfecting this poem. I completely agree that it needs to be cut down and thank you for pinpointing those things.

I think the problem is that the subject matter is just too personal, too fresh. In the meantime, I'll continue to rework it anyway. Thanks so much for your input! 

----- "Milk is for babies. When you grow up, you have to drink beer." - Arnold