Temper,Temper

I have done lots of  "collaborating" with other poets on poems. In my case it has been with one other poet at a time. (Except in the case of "renga" , I have done it both ways.  I have done renga series with another poet, which meant one poet sets out, starts with their haiku, then the other poet follows with another.  I have also participated with a group, anyone following the first, and then anyone continuing.  So it was a string of poets, and a string of renga. Each poet's contribution was left intact.

Then I've worked by alternating stanzas, or agreed sets of lines, ar just following the other's poetic lines with ones of my own, connecting.

Somnetimes we might question or suggest. But not outright edit. So there are all kinds of collaboration. The idea of outright editing another's verse is another, and the one that seems to be happening here.

In Laurie's case it was startling, and not what she expected.  It's a kind of odd collaborating I think. It does not seem like collaboration. It seems like editing, and critiquing,Collaboration is more collaborative in my mind. Or at least has some more clear agreement at the beginning.

The idea that all three of these verses could follow one another as a set is still to me very interesting, I must say, I am still most attracted to the mystery and wordiness of the original! But I like the other two as echoes of it. Not as negations or corrections or improvements.