i thought i'd never understand him

the real shock
came when i stuck the knife in the quartz heater
to get the tinfoil i dropped in there out.

interestingly,
electricity will arc

when I told Dad about it
he was shocked too
"What on Earth were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that I'd like to get the tinfoil out of the heater
so you wouldn't get mad at me," I think I might have whined
or maybe mewled
possibly sobbed.

For the briefest hint of a second
I was absolutely positive he was going to
rip my head off politely
and crazy glue it back on backwards

but he hugged me instead,
"Don't do that."

I promptly forgot about all that
until tonight when my son tried to pry a piece of an action figure out of a wall socket with a pocket knife.

I gave him the same advice my dad gave me,
and for two hours after he looked at me
like my head was on backwards.