Exercise 1b

These two are by Masaoka Shiki, who is probably my favorite haiku poet.

The tepid rain falls
On the bare thorn.


Thawed out pond.
A shrimp moves
Among old algae.

Both of these, in English translation lack the 5/7/5  construction, but both are true, i think, with their seasonal/nature elements and in the dissonance and enlightenment they lead to. I particularly like the interplay between the tepid and the bare in the first one. The image of rain and thorn. The softness of the rain, as enhanced by the use of the word 'tepid' against the harshness of a thorn. I find that one so utterly captivating. 

The other offers such a thick painting of a moment. It's so quiet and yet completely alive. the three elements, which I often think is too much, in this case seem just right. It is really one element - a pond, and then two sub-elements which describe it. The thaw, alludes to winter, death, and now the rejuvenation of spring. the shrimp and algae offer both the flora and fauna of the locale, and start to build a very specific type of pond. All in all, i just admire this type of writing so much.